"We really need to liven things up around here," said Mayor Twiddlethumbs to the ahem "press conference" at the town's only coffee shop, where three people had gathered to chitchat. "After this year's graduating class of three young people left to go to college, the population is now under 1,000 and I and the rest of the staff are bored out of our minds. Something drastic needs to be done."
Citing failed events meant to get the town actually excited about something as last year's best dressed cow competition, as well as the cleverly disguised "Treasure hunt" to clean up the undersides of the town's benches on Main Street. Twiddlethumbs also mentioned the sparsely attended "Let's sweep the sidewalks!" party and explained that if he doesn't come up with something new to do soon, the staff will start wasting their time at work selling those natural washcloths and nail-sticker-thingys. "I have a duty to keep them busy, or it all gets out of hand quickly."
Waytoosmall's bylaw officer said that he's happy for the news, as there's really only so many times he can fine Old Man Gunther for letting his cow poop on the Mayor's car every week before it stops being funny.
A Town Hall meeting is scheduled for next week, and a source close to the Mayor said he is considering bringing in professional protesters to make for a more lively meeting. "The last time only 5 people showed up and we ended up playing poker instead. That's the tenth time that's happened. Another time the whole council got bored discussing the same thing for the twelve hundreth time, started daydreaming and before you knew it an MLM meeting had broken out. This NEEDS to stop happening." He said (the Mayor) is also pleased at the potential popcorn sales a good argument at the meeting could bring in.
For more information on the meeting, please contact the town gossips, who will simply make up what they do not know.
No comments:
Post a Comment